i already forget how i used to feel about you

lifehouse- take me away.
this time all I want is you
there is no one else
who can take your place
this time you burned me with your eyes
you see past all the lies
you take it all away

I've seen it all and it's never enough
it keeps leaving me needing you

take me away take me away
I've got nothing left to say
just take me away

I try to make my way to you
but still I feel so lost
I don't know what else I can do
I've seen it all and it's never enough
it keeps leaving me needing you

take me away take me away
I've got nothing left to say
just take me away

don't give up on me yet
don't forget who I am
I know I'm not there yet
but don't let me stay here alone

this time all I want is you
there is no one else
who can take your place

I've seen it all
and it's never enough
it keeps leaving me needing you

take me away take me away
I've got nothing left to say
just take me away

take me away take me away
I've got nothing left to say
just take me away


isn't it queer how we always desire what we cannot get? and yet when we have it we just don't know how to treasure it. perhaps that is the charm of 'playing hard to get'. Because we always love the challenge of attaining something that we don't already have. When then do we actually know that we actually want something because we really want it?


isn't it strange when we say we only know what we have until we lost it? is it the same as wanting what we cannot have? or is it purely as simple as underappreciating the blessings in our life? that is, we have always wanted it but in our complacency took it for granted.
when do we ever get to be satisfied with what we have? why can't we ever be satisfied? im increasingly beginning to realise that being unsatisfied stems from an innate sense of inadequacy. perhaps we always seek that extra something because we always have the need to be complete.


we always say that Christ can complete us and He is all we need. Does that then mean that christians are never lonely or are always complete? What happens to the christian who feels inadequate? is he a bad christian? where then does friendship and love come in? it can't be an absolute truth taken blindly at face value, because surely God desires for us to have fellowship and love in our life. Surely God never intended for us to be isolated creatures only made for fellowship with Him. Maybe I am a bad christian because while I honestly believe God can complete us, I don't buy the idea that a christian is always complete.


So many times we fill our time with so many activities, but at the end of the day what do we really achieve? Not a difficult concept to grasp, just the usual pep talk of what is truly meaningful in life. Yet many of us still occupy ourself with so many activities, we are always busy, always running about. Perhaps it is because we know that if we actually have time to slow down, we will realise what terrible lifestyles we lead. Beneath the facade of a whole life, we have nothing to show. Empty shells without substance.


It is often said that the modern man's most common predicament is that of the confusion of identity. We never know who we really are. we seem to live in this glass panel never being able to break out of this enclosed comfort zone. No one can reach us and we cannot reach others. whether such a condition is self-imposed is unknown. Sylvia Plath definitely understood this. In her poem tulips, she writes


"I didn't want any flowers, I only wanted
To lie with my hands turned up and be utterly empty.
How free it is, you have no idea how free ----
The peacefulness is so big it dazes you,"


Maybe we do construct walls around us, fortresses in fact, protection barriers so we cannot get hurt. is that the answer to man's loneliness?


People are lucky to find soulmates. Is there actually someone out there who can complete us? A common meeting of ideals. To be perfectly comfortable with a person, to find someone else who understands you more than yourself. Our search of identity ends with that one person not because you now know who you are but because that soulmate understands and knows you so well.


To be able to just sit in silence yet speaking a million words at the same time. So often a time, we speak just to fill silence, a literary device cleverly crafted to mask our inadequacies and the voidness of meaningful connections. Isn't it such an irony that words that are meant to build people can equally be used to disguise the loneliness. Elliptical sentences, conversations that are inane, mere small talk. Sometimes silence is a better communication device because there is honesty in the awkardness.